Children in Nature

Share this post:

For two decades, I have conducted a program called “Children in the Woods” for Ontario Nature. Ontario Nature launched its first Earth Summit for Youth in 2010 at Cedar Glen YMCA Centre in York Region. The Summit moved from the Cedar Glen site to many years on the wonderful Lake Simcoe location at Geneva Park near Orillia until Covid hit.  The Youth Summit for Mother Earth has risen like a Phoenix and found a new nest at renowned Camp Tawingo in Huntsville.

This year I will be delivering the same program, “Children in the Woods” to a new generation of youth leaders at Camp Tawingo. Whether it is woods, fields, ponds, rivers or lakes, like Lake Ontario, these youth are on fire to protect their present and future. Theirs is the passion that encouraged me to continue to keep speaking out for environmental policy sanity at a point when I was about to throw in the towel.

I had launched Global Perspectives: The Periwinkle Project in 1989 as a response to the message of Our Common Future and the World Meteorological Organization warnings about accelerating climate change. It was an appeal to educational institutions to make Environmental Literacy a key component of the 21st Century curriculum. Research real problems, search for real solutions.

The Ontario Teachers Federation had just approved a ten point agenda for the inclusion of environmental and social justice issues as a mandatory part of the school curriculum. Then came Mike Harris and his Common Nonsense campaign. This racist, eco-illiterate Premier dismantled all of the curriculum we had put in place to educate students to prepare for their future. His chief-of-staff, Guy Giorno, responding to a complaint that all critical thinking skills were being removed from the curriculum, allegedly said, “It is not our job to nurture critical thinkers; it is out job to train productive consumers!”

The Harris government dismantled all of their Environment Ministry staff who had been a fabulous education resource for schools seeking solid fact-based information for their projects. My contact at the Ministry was labelled a “hostile employee” for continuing to provide me with inside information until her dismissal.

I was more than angry – we were just beginning to raise awareness and turn the tide and we elected a colonial troglodyte to lead us. My wife said, “Don’t water the rocks.” I put all my slide shows and presentations away and went into my cave. And then I got a call from Ontario Nature to present at their First Annual Youth Leadership Summit. Cedar Glen was right around the corner from our home in Caledon.  I remember thinking, “Once more into the breach dear friends, once more.” 

The positive energy and enthusiasm of the ON leaders and the youth in attendance, reignited  the fire in my belly. If they were willing to pick up the torch, I was not going to stop fanning the flames. This is our  home, and the care and security of our home should be dominant in the hearts, minds and spirits of every citizen of this planet. We are a miracle. For those of us not living in Gaza or Sudan or Ukraine, where basic needs of survival are dominant, we who live in the fairy tale world of North America should be able to give our energies to something greater than our cell phones and streaming media. 

So, now I find myself about to head to Huntsville. In a world governed by Fords and Trumps. They keep us all in a constant state of fear with their taxpayer funded ads of “Protect Ontario”, and “Tariff Terror” messaging. Not quite the encouragement to our youth to fight for environmental literacy, social justice, economic security, and respect for the integrity of creation. Not on our current Ontario provincial government’s agenda due to developer greed. Reduced to the back burner of our federal agenda due to Trump’s Terrible Tariff War. But these youth refuse to give up. So, in my elder years, I will give you whatever you need to never give up.

From another old poker player passing on wisdom:

“You’ve got to know when to hold ‘em,
Know when to fold ‘em,
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run.

You never count your money
When you’re sittin’ at the table.
They’ll be time enough for countin’
When the dealin’s done.’

And remember children, the deck is marked, and the house always wins … unless someone like us cares a whole awful lot. The way I see it.

Skid Crease, Caledon

The Naming Room, a satire

Share this post:

There is a huge room hidden deep underground at the Mar a Lago Golf Resort in Florida. It is the infamous Presidential NAMING ROOM. The Orange House, the new official home and office of the President of the United States, rises above ground shielding the Naming Room from intelligent thought and international law.

On this particular day, the President had summoned his favourite “YES” team of adoring acolytes to redraw a map of the world. The Don called attendance. “J.D.?” ‘Praise be, my Lord,” responded J.D. “Pete?” “Hooah, Commander!” shouted Pete with an enthusiastic fist pump. “Howard?” Silence. “HOWARD?” Howard “Sorry, My Liege, I was just catching up on the latest articles in “Seventeen.”

Marker Pen Pictures | Download Free Images on Unsplash“I have already decided,” stated the President, “to rename the World.” The YES team nodded in rapturous agreement. “We are going to rename Earth “Kallstadt” after my German Grandfather and Grandmother.””Whoa!”” cried Howard. “I thought your family was Swedish.”

The Don snickered, “That’s what we told people to avoid offending our Jewish clients in the real estate industry in New York. Yep, our family has been liars ever since we emigrated here from Germany,”

“I’m uncomfortable with this meeting,” whined  Howard.
“Would you be more comfortable if I released the full Epstein flight logs?” The Don snapped.  Howard fell silent.

“Next,” said the President, We are going to rename Israel as Jesus Land. I haven’t told Bibi yet.”
“Hooah!” shouted Pete, realizing his born-again ChristoFascist dream had finally come true, but totally unaware of the consequences. Like, that he would be destroying the teachings of peace, love, and groovy.

“OK, and after we rename every water body in the world as Gulf, Ocean, lake, river stream, pond. slough as America,” crowed The Don, ” I have scheduled our invasion of Canada. We will take ungrateful Canada as the 51st State in a secret attack in the spring of 2027!”

There was a stunned silence from the YES team. “Our Lord,” they cried in unison. “but Canada breeds Black Flies in May and June, and Mosquitoes in July and August!” “And then, Our Most Holy, the temperature drops and our camouflage suits are set for deserts and not the multi-coloured northern forests of September and October!”

“What’s worse,” whimpered Caribbean St. James Island loving Lutnick, “the frost starts in November, and winter freeze-up sets in from December until March! Can’t we just get our oil from Venezuela? It’s the same very dirty, thick, heavy crude as from Alberta.  And we could claim Cuba as the 51st State and reopen all the Havana Casinos to our billionaire buddies.”

The Don put down his Magic Sharpie, blank map of the world, and opened a new container of phentermine, and paused. “We’ll invade on Memorial Day in May – it will be a celebration of our military might! It will be the BIGGEST SURPRISE INVASION IN THE HISTORY OF PLANET AMERICA!”

Pete fist pumped, J.D. prayed, and Howard wet himself.

***

It took 50 Back Hawk helicopters (and one Golden Eagle helicopter named by Sharpie Executive Order for the President) to evacuate the invading forces. It was a blueberry  pollinating, black fly infested day in May, 2027 when another attempt by the Republic of America failed to conquer Canada. A fleet of Swedish-Canadian Gripon jets over the Great Canadian Lakes kept the skies safe for us all. In a strange twist of fate, German made submarines patrolled our coastlines, protecting us from the disease infested USA aircraft carriers and destroyers.

Oh, Canada!

“Give us a Lake to Swim, and a Lake to Row
And call this Lake Ontario!
A lake to swim, a lake to row
Lake Ontari-ari-ario!”

I stood with my mom and watched Marilyn Bell come out of the water in 1954. I was eight years old. She was the first recorded person ever to complete the swim across lamprey eel infested Lake Ontario. This woman stands head and shoulders above the man with the Magic Sharpie. It will always be Lake Ontario – from First People’s history to the best of our colonial heroes. This is our place to stand and grow! The way I see it.

Skid Crease, Caledon

***

 

The Westerners

Share this post:

Gee whiz, can you believe it Canada? Premiers Scott Moe (Saskatchewan) and Danielle Smith (Alberta) want to play ball with the Mad King of the South. Alberta wants to continue drinking bourbon and keep selling its tar sands oil to the USA, and Saskatchewan wants to keep pumping potash into American agribusiness. So much for a Team Canada approach to dealing with Trump’s Terrible Tariffs.

Keep in mind that both Alberta and Saskatchewan are part of the original “western alienation” movement that sprang from the federal government’s stance on national control of natural resources when the two areas became provinces in 1905. Based on their oil and cattle economies, Texas and Alberta seem made for each other, while Saskatchewan matches the oil pumping and dry land farming culture of some of the Great Plains states.

The majority of these US States and two provincial populations also tend to be socially conservative and fiercely supportive of individual rights and local resources over the collective national good. Politically, the old joke about “What happens when you cross a Texan with a Dakotan? Why, you get a conservative voting white, Christian Albertan!” rings all too true.

However, stereotyping is not helpful to constructive conversation. And considering my wife and I were married in Kananaskis, Alberta on the banks of the Bow River under the gaze of the Three Sisters mountain peaks, the separatists do not include some of my best friends. That and the memories of Grasslands National Park in Val Marie, Saskatchewan, as the most unique landscape on our cross-country trip for Canada’s 150th makes that province’s separation not open for discussion.

Canada is a unique coast to coast to coast experiment immersed in First People’s culture, colonial exploration and exploitation, resistance to American Republicanism, an outgoing, if sometimes superficial politeness, a sense of social justice, realization that we all “come from away,” and that “here” is where we choose to be. We are lobster, maple syrup, corn, wheat, beef and salmon. We are wood, hydro, uranium, aluminium, and steel. We are either paddling our canoe to safe harbours or dragging it back into the maelstrom.

To the fringe far right wing in Alberta and Saskatchewan, and the young protesters in Quebec, it’s time to decide if you are on Team Canada, or time to get out of the canoe and sink or swim on your own. Swim south down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico!

This is no time for Lily dippers.The way I see it.

*****

Skid Crease, Caledon

On a Happier Note …

Share this post:

In tumultuous times it’s wise to reflect on the random acts of kindness that keep us human. To calm myself down this morning after hearing about The Donald’s desire to rename Lake Ontario as Lake America, I recalled a chance meeting at my bank the other day.

It was one of those long line-up days where every teller was dealing with customers wanting credit cards or mortgage check-ups. To distract myself I started to focus on the back of the sweatshirt the person in front of me was wearing. It featured two Muskoka chairs in a bright sunset circle. I tapped her on the shoulder and said, “I like your sweatshirt logo – I’d love to be sitting there right now.”

The woman turned around with a sunshine smile and said, “Me too!” One question led to another and then to a discussion about our common love of the beauty of nature. I told her about the recent overnight camp I had done with children, and how awed they were with the sunset and sunrise they experienced. The wait in line flew by, and we shook hands and exchanged names before it was our turn at the teller’s booths. I left the bank with a smile.

A few days later, I was walking my dog around our neighbourhood when I heard my name being called. “Skid! I thought that was you.” I looked up into that sunshine smile once again. It was my new friend from the bank! “Hi, Andrea,” I said. “Do you live around here?” And yes, she did. Turns out we are one street apart and she knew the family that had given us our dog. We parted with a wave and a smile. New friends in the hood. When the universe throws us a lemon, it also gives us a chance to make lemonade.

We all need more Andrea moments. The way I see it.

Canada Sucks?

Share this post:

Well, so says Howard Lutnick, the USA Secretary of Commerce. The actual quote, when Lutnick commented on Canada’s negotiating strategy is: “That is, like, the worst strategy I’ve ever heard. They suck, they — look, we are a $30-trillion economy, right?”

Meet the man who derailed the Trade Talks between Canada and the USA. They were going well until Tariff loving, Trump adoring Howard Lutnick jumped into the negotiations. Howard is a Canada hater. And, while boasting about their $30-trillion economy, he neglected to mention he $40 Trillion debt facing the USA due to Trump deal making.

Granted, Howard Lutnick’s expertise on sucking cannot be denied. After all those trips to Epstein’s underage party Island as the “financial adviser” to a financial adviser paedophile, not to mention his unabashed loyalty to the current moronic man-child misdirecting that 30 trillion dollar economy, Howard certainly knows how to suck up to people in power.

We get known by the company we keep, Mr. Lutnick. As we say here in Canada, Howard, “Phoque yeux,” and then “Phoque oeuf!” The way I see it.