Aren’t politics ironic, don’t you think?

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Irony, by common definition, is the expression of one’s meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect. As students of English Literature, we learned that dramatic irony occurs when the reader knows what is going on, but the characters in the poem, novel, play do not.

Political irony is a little different. It occurs when politicians say or print or graphic something that is the total opposite of who they are and/or what they do or have done. The effect is not humourous but it does tend to emphatically highlight their hypocrisy.

Two examples will suffice to illustrate this concept clearly. The WE Charity controversy that dominated the media for much of 2020 was created by the Conservative and NDP parties for the sole purpose of tarnishing Justin Trudeau and the Liberal Party of Canada. Although all of the spurious accusations against the government and its leader were found to be groundless by the the federal Ethics watchdog, the WE Charity was destroyed.

This was an international development charity and youth empowerment movement founded in 1995 by human rights advocates Marc and Craig Kielburger. They started it on a dream when they were teenagers, and it brought inspiration, opportunity and global success to youth around the world for over 25 years. In the summer of the pandemic when students desperately needed employment, the Conservative led attack against WE crushed the dream and their program to provide projects and grants to post-secondary students across Canada.

Less than a month after the dust had settled on the WE controversy, we received a full colour brochure in the mail from our local Conservative Party of Canada MP, Kyle Seeback. It had his smiling face on the front cover beside the banner headline “Opportunities for Youth” … too little, too late Kyle.  That’s political irony and hypocrisy in action.

 

The second example is closer to home. On November 26, 2020, Caledon Regional Councillor Annette Groves voted against her own Town of Caledon at the Region of Peel. The subject of the vote was a motion to reduce Caledon’s Regional Councillors by 2 and add 2 seats to Brampton’s delegation. Her colleagues in Caledon were totally blindsided. At a time when Caledon’s population is expected to grow exponentially over the next ten years, losing representation at the Region made absolutely no sense at all.

At a Special Session of Council streamed live on November 30th, Ms. Grove’s actions and the passing of the motion were widely condemned by citizen delegations and Councillors alike. The next day in our Canada Post mailbox, I received a full colour three-page fold out brochure. There on the front page was Ms. Grove’s smiling face beside the banner headline, “Dear Friends and Neighbours.” That’s political irony and hypocrisy at its finest.

With friends like these, we don’t need enemies. But we may need a lesson in media literacy to remind us that all that glitters is not gold. Those happy smiling faces and weasel word headlines are designed to lure us into the lie. Remember carefully the words of warning in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet:

O’ serpent heart hid with flowering face! Dove-feathered raven, wolfish-ravening lamb.Despised substance of divinest show! Just opposite to what thou justly seem’st.

Yes, when political irony is in play, put on your sunglasses, look past the glitter, and pray we don’t get fooled again.

The way I see it.

***

Skid Crease, Caledon

*images from politicalbrochures.com

Lies, and Lying Liars

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 Here is the clearest possible example we can find of the reason why there is so much cognitive dissonance that occurs every time a Conservative politician opens his or her mouth in Ontario. Yesterday, the COVID-19 data summaries for Ontario were truly frightening:

• 1478 new cases and 21 deaths

• Toronto had 356 cases, and Peel hit a record 572 cases

• 63% increase in hospitalizations

Now read those numbers over again, very carefully.

Today Ontario reached a new record of 1855 cases.

This data is factually correct. As is the data in the Auditor General’s Annual Report that criticized the Ford government’s inadequate response to the pandemic. Factually correct.

Now, here is what the Premier and his minions said to The People of Ontario yesterday: “We are flattening the curve,” using reports from the burgeoningly obese and inefficient “Science Table” as proof of their success. “Provincial Health reports that cases appear to be flattening.”

Even with a modicum of literacy and mathematics skills, a perfectly ordinary person can look at the data, compare that to the Premier’s spin marketing and realize that reality is off the charts here. The government is lying to us. The curve is NOT flattening.

Ontario needs to know exactly who composes the bulky membership of that “Science Table” and who exactly is issuing those “Provincial Health” Reports. According to Bonnie Lysyk (MBA, FCPA, FCA, LPA), our Auditor General, the provincial response to COVID-19 has been anything but open, transparent and accurate. The Premier sputters and lies in response, the Minister of Health feigns indignation and lies in response. But neither tells the truth or accepts responsibility.

This is not confined to Ontario. Yesterday in Quebec, Premier Legault told the bald-faced lie that “the COVID fight is almost over because we have the vaccine.” The fight is just beginning, you COVIDIOT, and the vaccine won’t be available to most Canadians until at least the summer of 2021. Joyeux Noel.

When the lying liars tell us that accurate reports are lies, that a record setting rise in caseloads and hospitalizations appears to be a flattening of the curve, and the fight is almost over when our opponent appears to be getting stronger, it’s time to change the diapers.

The way I see it.

***

Skid Crease, Caledon

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Herd Stupidity

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Over the course of the coronavirus pandemic, the term “herd immunity” has become a part of our vocabulary. That was based on the ill-founded hope that if enough people got exposed to COVID-19, the general population might develop an immunity to the virus.

And while herd immunity may be a distant dream, herd stupidity is flourishing. It was on full display in Toronto recently as groups of anti-maskers, anti-vaxxers, Q-Anon conspiracists, evangelical extremists, MAGA cap deplorables, freedom rally revolutionaries,  and the curious public joined the owner of Adamson’s BBQ as he protested his right to violate Ontario’s pandemic health guidelines restricting indoor dining.

As scatologists have noted, that the moment after a dog drops a piece of excrement on your lawn, carrion flies appear out of nowhere to congregate for the feast. So it is with the Adamson BBQ “freedom” protest, and the scent spread like wildfire on social media. We don’t have to go to the US and watch Thanksgiving and Black Friday crowds to see clear examples of herd stupidity. We have our own outstanding examples right here in Toronto the Good.

The way I see it.

***

Skid Crease, Caledon

* image from blogto.com

 

The Good News

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We all woke up this morning to the good news that the outgoing president of the Disunited States of America has finally allowed the formal transition to begin for a legitimate President named Joseph R. Biden along with his Vice-President, Kamala J. Harris. Took long enough but, as Leonard Cohen sings, “Democracy is coming to the USA!”

And while there is still bad news out there about the millions of COVIDIOT carrion flies travelling across country to feast on turkey carrion for this Unthanksgiving long weekend, there is good news in many neighbourhoods.

As wiser elders have often said, “We cannot appreciate the warmth of the light until we have emerged from the cold darkness,” So it is with the good news.

The good news in our lockdown neighbourhood is that we have mostly wonderful neighbours. Granted, we also have a challenged family with their attack dogs and multiple idling cars, and neglected property, but in perspective it means nothing, We have in abundance good neighbours with happy pets, respectful conversations, shared stories, and loving helpful children.

After a recent  hospital visit, I found multiple containers of the most delicious meals imaginable on my front porch.  The note said: “In my culture, the respected Elder is to be treated like a King,”

I love my neighbourhood. That’s the good news!

***

Skid Crease, Caledon

*  image from azquotes.com 

An American Thanksgiving, 2020

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 Ah, American Thanksgiving. Truly one of the greatest myths of all time. How does a fanatical religious cult of Plymouth Pilgrims show their thanks to the Wampanoag Native Americans who shared an autumn harvest feast with them and saved them from sickness and starvation that first fateful winter? Why, they spend the next 400 years stealing their lands from coast to coast to coast, and committing cultural genocide. In your God We Trust? Thanks, but no thanks.

But the myth is so strong, that even with cases surging, hospitals overwhelmed, and over 250,000 Americans dead from the coronavirus pandemic, family members, partners and friends will ignore all of the Federal CDC and local State health guidelines telling them to stay home and not to travel. They will joyfully jump into their cars, and head off to a big fat family Thanksgiving dinner. Everyone they contacted along the way will get to share in the feast. Herd stupidity ensures that super-spreader events, like Thanksgiving, will flourish.

This year, the Thanksgiving Break goes from Thursday, November 26, through the Black Friday holiday, and into the weekend. At least four days to share aerosols and droplets with all you love, and all those you meet along the way. As Tevye sings in Fiddler on the Roof, “Tradition!” And this particular Thanksgiving is a tradition to die for.

This Thanksgiving 2020, a microscopic virus will be giving thanks for all of the covidiots. In November of 2021, the survivors will celebrate the 400th Anniversary of that first mythical Thanksgiving feast. Miigwech.

The way I see it.

***

Skid Crease, Caledon

* image from pinoytransplant.com